How to Choose Funeral Flowers for Your Mom’s Service
Assuming you found this post because your mother recently passed away, it’s easy to also assume that you’re: searching for information on the etiquette and protocol of buying funeral flowers for your mother, seeking inspiration for creative arrangements that pay tribute to your mother, or shopping around to compare the prices of online vendors.
In the sections below, we provide you with all the information and resources you need to honor your mother’s memory.
All the funeral flowers on this page come from the top three online shops that deliver in the US — FTD.com, ProFlowers.com, and FromYouFlowers.com. Together, these shops have designed and delivered over 100 million arrangements.
Click on any image to be redirected to the online shop that sells the arrangement.
If you’re searching for the best online florists that deliver in the UK, read our reviews here.
Etiquette: Flowers & Arrangements for Your Mother’s Funeral
As a close relative of the deceased, you are responsible for the casket spray that will sit atop the coffin during the funeral service. This should be your first priority when shopping for funeral flower arrangements. Immediate family members also provide arrangements that are placed inside the casket (handheld bouquet, floral pillow, wreath); these are referred to as casket adornments.
In this guide we’ll discuss how to choose flowers and color palettes for the casket spray and how to match your casket spray of choice with any extra adornments you would like to include. We’ll go into all that in the following sections. For now, take note of which arrangements you are responsible for providing.
To put it simply: any flowers that go inside or on top of the casket, are chosen by immediate family only. These family members are usually the people planning the funeral service. That said, depending on the bonds and relationships of your family, you can coordinate with more distant relatives (cousins, aunts/uncles, etc.) to share the responsibility of styling the casket.
Family and friends who are not planning the casket arrangements, provide standing sprays and wreaths, floor bouquets and table arrangements.
Flowers You Should Use in Your Mother’s Funeral Arrangements
Now that we’ve covered which arrangements you’ll need to provide for the service, let’s discuss your options for flowers. This step is when you consider your mother’s personality, the flowers she loved most, her favorite color, her birth month, or her hobbies. Of course, you can also opt for flowers traditionally used for funerals, or base your decision on the symbolism of a flower.
Let’s explore each idea:
Custom-designed funeral flowers are chosen by families who want to highlight a particular hobby, personality trait, or passion of the deceased. For example, if your mother spent her time playing poker and vacationing in Vegas, you could have a florists design an arrangement that features playing cards or poker chips. If she was a devout Christian, you could have flowers arranged in the shape of a cross. Or if she was an avid tennis player, the flowers could be shaped like a racket and ball. There are hundreds of possibilities.
Another way to pay tribute to your mother’s life and personality, without having flowers shaped to represent an object, is to place framed photos in a casket spray. This allows you to share wonderful memories with those at the service, and it’s a simple and elegant way to remember the things she loved most.
Funeral Arrangements that Showcase Your Mother’s Favorite Color
If your mother wore mostly red, drove a red car, and painted her home walls red, she probably really liked red. In that case, honor her with a red arrangement. That seems simple enough, but what if your mom never expressed a love of one color in particular? Well, even if your mom didn’t have a favorite color, you can still use this process as a way to choose flowers.
In general funeral arrangements for women favor pastel hues (Easter colors). That said, brighter, more tropical hues are preferred by some. So think about your mother’s personality — did she like softer colors or more vibrant shades? This will provide you with some direction for which color palette is most appropriate for your mom’s service.
You can also rely on the current season for inspiration. Will the funeral services take place in spring? Purple, pink and green arrangements are lovely that time of year, as are yellow and tropical-hued sprays. In the autumn, sunflowers and deep earthy tones (think pumpkin and burnt red) are quite appropriate. In winter, red blossoms are very fitting.
We briefly discuss seasons again in the next section, so you’ll find more ideas there too. We also touch on using the color that represents her birthday month as a symbolic way to honor her birth and life.
Pay Tribute with Flowers that Represent Her Birthday Month
When we’re mourning, it’s extremely difficult to imagine celebrating anything. Yet, that’s exactly what I’m about to recommend you do. Instead of randomly selecting a casket spray, that has little or no meaning to you, celebrate the month your mother came into this world by selecting an arrangement that represents the month of her birth.
Here are the flowers we suggest for each month:
January: carnation or snow drop
February: violet or primrose
March: daffodil or jonquil
April: sweet pea or daisy
May: lily of the valley or hawthorn
June: rose or honeysuckle
July: water lily, larkspur (delphinium)
August: gladiolus or poppy
September: aster or morning glory
October: calendula (marigold) or cosmos
You can also use the colors associated with months to choose flowers. For example, purple is a special color for those born in February, so instead of using violet or primrose blossoms (as suggested above) you could choose any purple blossoms. Following this same line of thinking, you could choose any red blossoms if you’re mother was born in December. Just remember that arrangements made of only red roses are more common in funeral services for men.
In the end, it’s better to choose flowers and colors that make sense for your mom’s funeral service, despite what’s traditional or commonly done. You should choose flowers for her — not a funeral director or the grieving. So if a casket spray of red roses makes total sense for your mom, disregard what I said above. These aren’t rules anyway, just loose guidelines.
And with that, we’ll move into the art of expressing your feelings with flowers. The idea might sound a little outdated, but it’s really not. The number one thing people want to know when they’re shopping for funeral flowers is what certain flowers symbolize. So let’s dive in.
The Language of Flowers — Learn Which Flowers are Appropriate for Your Mom’s Funeral
Every flower has a symbolic meaning that was once important and more commonly understood. Arrangements were sent to homes to convey messages or relay secret codes. Nowadays we send flowers because we like the way they look — not because we’re concerned with what they mean. That said, most people express some anxiety when choosing funeral flowers, afraid that they’ve chosen a type of flower that isn’t appropriate for the service.
To put your mind at ease, we’ve compiled a list of flowers that are excellent choices for your mother’s funeral.
Pink carnations, the most obvious flower choice for a mother’s funeral, symbolize a mother’s undying love. The story is that the first carnations sprung up from the ground where Mary shed her tears over Jesus’ death. Because of such strong symbolism, pink carnations are a very popular choice for funeral arrangements for mothers. Other colors of carnations are also appropriate: soft red carnations symbolize admiration and white carnations symbolizes pure love and good luck.
The association between roses and motherhood go back to the days of ancient Egypt.
Red and yellow roses are definitely used in funeral arrangements for mothers, but pink roses are by far the most popular choice. Pink roses symbolize gratitude, appreciation, and admiration, which is why they’re wonderful for honoring mothers. Yellow roses symbolize friendship, and red roses are typically associated with lovers; despite the link between red roses and romantic, passionate love, many people use them in funeral arrangements for their mothers or other family members to symbolize strong, undying love.
Symbolize the love between a mother and child.
White lilies are commonly used for funerals because they are associated with the virtue of the Virgin Mary and have come to symbolize Christian resurrection. Lilies are the flowers most commonly associated with funerals because they represent the soul’s restored innocence after death. See arrangements with lilies.
Pink tulips speak of a close, special bond that is caring and nurturing (as in, not passionate and romantic like the red tulip), which makes the color appropriate for giving to your mother. Yellow tulips symbolize cheerful thoughts, joy, and new life, and white tulips represent forgiveness, respect and purity. Pink, yellow and white are the three most commonly used colors for tulip arrangements specifically designed for funerals. See arrangements with tulips.
This flower is the inspiration for France’s emblem, the Fleur de Lis. If you’ve ever visited New Orleans, Louisiana, you know how important the symbol is there as well. As with all other flowers, different colors symbolize various emotions or messages. Blue symbolizes hope and faith; purple denotes wisdom; and pink represents admiration and cherished friendship. Yellow represents passion.
Best Funeral Flowers For Mom: Online Arrangements
We’ve put together a small group of funeral arrangements that might be suitable for your mother’s service.
Together, these shops have designed and delivered over 100 million arrangements. They’re trusted. They’re affordable. And they offer same-day delivery and a fresh-flower guarantee.
Click on any image to be redirected to the online shop that sells the arrangement.
Other Pages — Funeral Flowers Ideas
If you’re interested in learning more about funeral flowers in general, we’ve grouped funeral flowers by color, explained the symbolism and meaning of funeral flowers, listed common types of flowers used in funeral arrangements, and described the different types of funeral arrangements. We’ve also looked into the history of funeral flowers.
And, we’ve compiled some ideas for what to say on the sympathy message sent with the flowers.